Call Or Wait After a First Date?

When Should You Call After a First Date?


Woman receiving a phone call from manYou've just had a brilliant first date, and you can't wait for the second. But you don't want to scare her off by calling too soon or push her away by waiting too long. How long is too long before you call for a second date?

Your first date was better than you hoped. You were charming, witty, there was a definite spark between you. Now you're eager to see her again. You really like this girl and don't want to ruin things by calling too early or too late. In fact, you'd like that call to be 'perfect timing.' So when should you call after a first date? Here are a few helpful tips:

  • Think about her: You might not know much about her yet, but from the first date think about what you do know. Is she shy, flirty, intelligent? What does she like? A shyer girl might be more comfortable with a slightly longer time-wait, while a flirty girl might expect a phone call directly after the first date. Misreading her is asking for a lame 'I have a pedicure that night' excuse.

  • Make it impossible for her to say no: The second date is almost more important than the first date- you have to follow up with showing her that you were paying attention. Plan the second date carefully. Check the weather forecast, make reservations (let's face it, they can always be canceled if you have to) and avoid anything that could be awkward or embarrassing. A metal concert of your favorite band might not be her cup of tea.

  • Test the waters: Thankfully, guys, there are possibilities for contact without a nerve-wracking call after the first date. You can email her, send her a gift on Facebook, text or twitter. Her response will tell you how to continue. If she's warm and replies quickly, follow her lead. If she waits, then slow down a little and give her some space.

  • Don't listen to your buddies: In male mythology, there are a lot of 'givens.' Wait exactly two days. Wait a week, because if you treat her mean you'll keep her keen. Don't call her, let her call you. It's rubbish. You need to listen to yourself. Do you really like her, or are you just having fun? How much you like her should be reflected in the time you wait to call after the first date. If you like her a lot, it won't hurt you to show it.

  • Don't get obsessive: Some contact is good. One call to set up the second date is good. Calling her over and over again, or texting every five minutes isn't just annoying- it's slightly scary. She'll run faster than you can press redial.

The underlying factor of when you should call after a first date really depends on you: your instincts, your impressions of her and how you feel. If you don't over-analyze the second call too much, and let yourself be natural, then that is the perfect timing to call.